I have been thinking about blogging and the internet and what constitutes reality lately. I think that the internet is great. Really, it has so many uses and in many ways we kind of couldn't live life without it...I use it for school, at work, and for keeping in touch with family and friends. I am thankful for technology and I really enjoy blogging for the purposes of keeping in touch, journaling, and just plain entertainment (if I am being truly honest...)
But it isn't real life, and I think that can get us in trouble. Girls, especially, because the internet makes it incredibly easy for us to compare ourselves with one another which we do plenty well enough in real life, at least I do. I noticed that I was getting into a few nasty habits with blogs and Facebook and everything that is not quite real, and after a horrendous meltdown on the last day of finals (an external factor that may have had something to do with ameliorating the situation) I realized that it needed to stop, and fast.
You see, I had a few blogs that I would read from time to time that were admittedly just for the plain fact that they were living these dream lives and at first I would just roll my eyes at how over the top they seemed, but as time went on I started getting a little jealous of them. Some of them are so perky and flashy and over the top that I kind of started getting down on myself about the fact that our life isn't like that. And it was messed up, and unfair to me and especially to Dave, because suddenly he has a wife that is mad at him because he hasn't done the list of "normal" things for her that she has accumulated in her head from the blogging world. Why didn't we get to go on a honeymoon to Mexico? Why don't I get flowers every Wednesday? We never get to go out on expensive dates but ____________ does it all the time and they are students too so there must be something wrong with us!!!!
So, over Christmas and after a very bratty temper tantrum on our "fake" anniversary before our trip (which was so cool and why am I not grateful for the awesome things I DO have?) I decided to take a step back from the internet for a little bit. I needed a reality check, and a little dose of gratitude. And I thought a lot about not comparing my life to other peoples', and I also decided that I am done reading blogs of people that I don't even really know, because that is just a waste of time and totally dumb. If you are not a person that I am friends with or related to, or a practical blog that is teaching me something, I won't be reading you. Because so many of these young, married, perfect life people just make me mad and spoiled and make my expectations wayyyyy too dumb and high. And I thought about this talk from Elder Bednar (from his devotional in 2008, "Things as They Really Are"):
"Today...a person can concoct a counterfeit identity that does not correlate in any way to things as they really are. However closely the assumed new identity approximates the individual, such behavior is the essence of things as they really are not."
No one has a perfect life all the time! And anyone who pretends it is either is delusional or has another thing comin'. But to those of you who I love, and are my friends, I LOVE reading about you and your families and the fun stuff that you do! So I am definitely not talking to you at all. Because real-life friends are the best kind that inspire you and make you happy to hear about.
Those are my ramblings for the night. Time to quit the fake cyber world and go spend time with my real-life husband.